strongest flower in the garden of life

It is kinda awkward actually to start writing this post. It's been awhile isn't it? Yeah now I have the urge to write something important in my life. Aha! Before that. I will post the Footprints in My Heart (part 4) in the near future. Sorry. I have been so busy with university life. You know that common teenager doing during university time. I don't do wild things. Hey I'm a good boy. Trust me. Look into my eyes. (/.\) Can't see it? Your problem, not mine. Enough.

Anyway, last week is memorable. A very important week I must say. 19,20,21 September. All of these dates are crucial in my life. Let's just say that I will be dead if I accidentally don't remember it. Let's just keep these thing as a secret shall we? :) and to those people who are related to this dates, you know who you are. You guys are very special in my life. I love you guys.

Well I get to meet my new sahabat. Asim. A very good man, indeed. A little bit older than me but I know he can influence me in a good way. It is very rare to find this type of people nowadays. How I wish I can introduce him to you guys. Oh well. Perhaps next time.

Actually, my main purpose to write this post is about my beloved sister. She has been admitted to Ampang Puteri Specialist Hospital and was suspected with left gluteal abscess. Find out more in google.com. For that reason, she had to face a surgery. I wasn't sure how I felt by the time I hear this news. I was trying to be optimistic I guess? See there? I was trying very hard. I used to be that man. Very optimistic one. But hearing this news was just freaking me out. It scare the death out of me. But alhamdulillah. She managed to get through it. She is a tough woman, anyway. Praises to Allah. I couldn't thank Him enough with this. I love my sister very much. Very much. She is my everything. I can live without a girl but I couldn't live without my big sister. Though she loves to bully me. Haha.

Kak, I just want you to know that I really miss your jokes, really. I miss your laugh. Your smile. Your 'lectures' about everything. Your story. Yeah. Your story. Your singing. You sound amazing. Your voice can calm me down. This is somehow pretty weird but I really miss your bullying-little-brother moment. Up until now, I can't beat you in a word fight. Haha. I would love to hear all of that again when you recover from your surgery. Yeah, thanks for showing me the meaning of bravery. You inspired me many things. You know, to be honest, when I shake and kiss your hand after your operation and seeing you still in 'that' way, I was holding my tears, kak. It was painful to see you that way but I know I must stay strong for you. Speedy recovery, kak tasya. I miss you. Your little brother miss you. I will wait for you. May Allah bless your life and your health. This is a sign of great things will happen, right kak? There's always blessing in disguise. I believe in Allah and I will stick to that.

footprints in my heart (part 3)

Suatu pagi yang nyaman di Maldives. Ombak laut yang beralun, ditemani dengan burung-burung berterbangan diatasnya. Matahari baru sahaja hendak terbit untuk melakukan tugas hariannya. Pagi yang sangat indah terutama kepada pasangan yang baru sahaja berkahwin, William dan Ashley. Sudah menjadi impian William untuk membawa isterinya berbulan madu di situ. Di dalam bilik mereka yang berhadapan dengan lautan dan matahari terbit, Ashley membuka tirai dan menyaksikan suatu keindahan yang tidak dapat dilupakan. Alangkah bagusnya jikalau dapat tinggal di situ. Di Maldives juga ramai orang akan jumpa ketenangan yang mereka tidak akan dapat melupakan. William dan Ashley dapat berdua-duaan tanpa sebarang gangguan dan kerja. Bulan madu yang sangat indah bagi mereka berdua.

Ashley: Good morning, willy. 
William: Hey beautiful. Good morning. *kissing his wife*
Ashley: *while smiling* Wake up, lazy man. It's time to rise and shine !
William: Hmm give me 10 minutes. 
Ashley: Let's have some breakfast shall we? I want some food. *convincing william*
William: Yeah let's go. Hey sweetie, come here. *kissing Ashley's forehead*


Maldives merupakan lokasi berbulan madu yang strategik. Mempunyai pulau dan laut yang indah, dan antara tarikannya ialah terumbu karang yang besar dan terkenal dengan kecantikkannya. Sesiapa sahaja yang berkunjung ke sana pasti terpukau dengan suasana tenang dan aman itu. Semasa bersarapan, Ashley bertanyakan soalan kepada William.

Ashley: Don't you want any kids in the near future?
William: *a lil bit shock while trying to swallow his breakfast* Of course I want the same thing. I love kids. 
Ashley: Hmm so let's plan quick ! I can't wait for my first child !
William: Easy there. There's no need to rush. Slowly, my dear. You scared me. Lol.
Ashley: But I can't wait to have my own kids. :(
William: Haha. Alright then ! We'll figure out something, okay darling?
Ashley: *nodding* Okay sweetheart. *smiling meaningfully*

Kembalinya mereka dari berbulan madu, William di dalam proses untuk mencari rumah pertama mereka. Sementara itu, mereka berdua tinggal di rumah keluarga William yg tersergam indah. Pada satu hari, William pulang ke rumah keluarganya dengan berita gembira. Pencariannya untuk rumah pertama dia dan Ashley telah tercapai. Akhirnya pasangan itu berpindah keluar dan Ashley amat terkejut apabila William menyediakan satu studio muzik khas untuknya mencari ilham atau berehat bersama alatan muziknya. Di situ tersedia gitar, piano, violin, trumpet, drum, dan segala peralatan sesebuah studio muzik perlukan. Kemudiannya, William menunjukkan gelanggang bola keranjang, kolam, taman di belakang rumah, dapur, bilik2 tetamu dan bilik utama mereka. Semuanya telah dilengkapi dengan perabot yang serba mahal dan berkualiti. Rumah idaman telah mereka dapat. William membawa Ashley ke garaj dan memberi kunci kepada Ashley. Ashley bingung dan mendapati ada sebuah kereta Ford Focus di dalamnya. William berkata,

William: That's your car, my dear. *smiling*
Ashley: *in shocked* Are you sure this is mine? How do you know I have been in love with this car since months ago? *about to burst into tears*
William: I know my sweetheart very much. :)
Ashley: Thanks, honey ! ;')


Selang beberapa tahun, pasangan itu mendapat anak kembar, lelaki dan perempuan. Lelaki diberi nama Adam manakala perempuan Ellie. William menangis terharu tatkala memegang kedua-dua anaknya dan mengucap rasa syukur kerana dikurniakan bayi yang sihat dan sempurna. William juga sebelum itu tidak pernah meninggalkan Ashley di dalam bilik bersalin dan berada di sampingnya seperti mana yang dia mahu. William memeluk Ashley yang sedang terbaring di atas katil dan mencium dahi isterinya. Dia sudah menjadi seorang ayah.

Adam yang berumur 4 tahun sedang berlatih bermain bola keranjang bersama William dan semenjak dari itu dia telah menunjukkan minatnya di dalam sukan itu. Mana tak tumpahnya kuah kalau tidak ke nasi kan. Jadi, William telah mengaturkan satu temu janji untuk anak lelakinya untuk bermain bola keranjang di dalam sebuah akademi tempatan. Ellie pula berbeza dari abangnya. Dia amat simple dan amat menyukai benda-benda comel. Lumrah perempuan agaknya. Tetapi Ellie juga mempunyai citarasa yang amat tinggi dalam fesyen terutama fesyen kanak-kanak pada peringkat umurnya. Menjadi keutamaan Ashley untuk membeli segala keperluan untuk anak perempuannya terutamanya pada barang-barang seperti baju, seluar, kasut dan sebagainya. Ellie berbeza dengan kanak-kanak lain. Dia tidak suka bermain anak patung seperti yang dijangkakan. Terdapat satu persamaan antara Ellie dan Adam iaitu kedua-duanya amat meminati music. Ellie bermain violin manakala Adam bermain piano. Mereka berdua mengikuti kelas di akademi muzik ibu mereka yang baru sahaja ditubuhkan setahun yang lalu.

William dan Ashley akan memastikan anak-anak mereka tidak melupakan pelajaran mereka dan menyediakan khidmat 'private tutor' di rumah untuk memastikan mereka faham dengan apa yang dipelajari di sekolah. Tidak lupa juga William dan Ashley tidak pernah menghalang jikalau anak-anak mereka bertukar minat ke arah benda lain selagi ianya tidak memudaratkan diri mereka.

Setiap malam, William akan menyanyikan lagu tidur untuk anaknya yang dikarang oleh Ashley sendiri khas untuk anak-anak mereka. Kemudian William akan mencium dahi anaknya dan dia tidak pernah lupa untuk berbuat demikian biarpun sibuk dengan urusan kerja dan permainan bola keranjangnya. Dek kerana populariti, beliau memastikan anak-anaknya selesa dengan kehidupan yang ada dan cuba sedaya upaya untuk mengasingkan media massa dari keluarganya. Mereka sekeluarga hidup bahagia. Kebanyakkan masa lapang mereka diisi dengan melancong ke serata dunia. Bagaikan sudah menjadi adat dalam keluarga mereka apabila tiba musim cuti sekolah, mereka akan menempah tiket ke serata dunia untuk tujuan melancong. William dan Ashley memang mempunyai satu hobi yang sama iaitu melancong dan pernah berangan untuk melancong bersama anak-anak. All we can say is their dream came true.

let's set the world on fire, we can burn brighter than the sun

seriously? is it june 15th already? whatthe. man man, i never expect things to be like this. i know i owe you guys another part of footprints in my heart, but really my life has been busy since a month ago. i have to make a preparation to university, and right now is the only time where i can have time for myself. for your information, im studying diploma in accountancy (fast track) at UiTM Puncak Perdana. for those who are curious, the difference between my program and others are i get to do my diploma for two years and directly further my studies in degree for 2 and a half years. well im lovin it here ! as a basketball player, a court that next to your block is such heavenly feeling. and i have been submit into uitm basketball team. alhamdulillah. iam pursuing my dream right now. it has been my dream since i was a little to play for university. but unfortunately, my favorite shoes has broken. :( god i need to buy a new one. *sigh my life here? i must say im one of those lucky human being when i have been appointed to Uitm Puncak Perdana. i got a really cool, sporting and crazy housemates, coolest classmates ever. alhamdulillah, iam a class rep for ac1111c group and yet i hold so many responsible this semester. for your info, there are only two faculty here, accountancy and film, theatre and animation or we called them as fita. this is new life, new phase, new challenge. oh ya about that mini novel, i will update it as soon as possible. :) gotta go now. toodles!

p/s: mannn i miss blogging.

footprints in my heart (part 2)

Hari perkahwinan Ashley dan William sangat meriah. Hari yang sangat sempurna bagi mereka. Sangat sibuk pada hari itu. Mereka menghadapi sedikit kesulitan tapi diatasi dengan bijak oleh ayah William. William memandang tinggi ayahnya dan tahu segala persiapan perkahwinannya diurus baik oleh mak dan kakak-kakaknya. Keluarga Ashley diterima baik oleh keluarga William. Dalam masa yang sungguh singkat, kedua-dua belah keluarga bagaikan sudah lama mengenali sesama sendiri walhal baru sahaja dipertemukan dua minggu yang lepas. Ramai ahli keluarga dan sanak saudara hadir pada hari tersebut. Termasuk la juga sahabat handai Ashley dan William yang turut memeriahkan majlis perkahwinan mereka. Mereka juga tidak lokek memberikan senyuman kepada media yang dijemput. Maklum sahajalah selain pemain bola keranjang, William juga merupakan seorang selebriti yang disanjung ramai dan menjadi idola ramai wanita dek karakternya yang romantik, manja, matang, dan seorang yang berupa paras kacak. Dengan mata yang berwarna hijau kebiruan, ianya menangkap hati Ashley yang memandang William berdiri di sebelahnya. Alangkah bertuahnya Ashley menerima seorang lelaki yang begitu hebat dalam hidupnya. Biarpun dibelenggu rasa cemburu setiap kali William dikelilingi oleh wanita semasa ada event penting mahupun club's tour, tetapi Ashley cuba untuk tidak menyalah anggap William dalam hal ini kerana dia tahu, William berasal dari keluarga yang amat mementingkan keluarga lebih dari segalanya. Hasil didikan keluarga yang telah membentuk William pada hari ini.

William telah memberitahu kepada salah seorang deejay di perkahwinannya untuk memasang satu playlist lagu-lagu antara dia dan Ashley. Dia tahu, Ashley pernah menyatakan hasrat hatinya untuk menari bersama bakal suaminya satu hari nanti. William bersungguh-sungguh untuk memenuhi kehendak Ashley semenjak dari dulu lagi. Tapi disebabkan jadualnya yang sibuk, hasrat itu terpaksa tergendala buat sementara waktu. Di kesempatan ini, William yang baru belajar menari mengajak isterinya itu menari bersamanya. ''Wanna dance with me?'' kata William kepada Ashley. Ashley tanpa segan silu menerima pelawaan suaminya itu dan lagu Can I Have This Dance berkumandang. Ashley cuba untuk mengikut rentak suaminya diikuti dengan lagu tu. Lama kelamaan Ashley berasa selesa dan menghayati setiap bibit menari itu dengan suaminya. Semasa lagu kedua mereka berkumandang iaitu You and Me - Lifehouse, Ashley meletakkan kepalanya diatas bahu William dan menari bersamanya. Masa itu, saat itu, hanya kepunyaan mereka berdua. Para hadirin yang lain sungguh asyik dengan pasangan suami isteri itu. Semasa lagu tersebut di saat akhir, William mengangkat kepala Ashley dari bahunya dan perasan isteri tersayangnya mengalirkan airmata. Secara tiba-tiba,

William: Hey sweetie. *while kissing Ashley's eyes*
Ashley: What are you doing, honey?
William: I just want to wash away all your tears with kisses, because they say kiss can bring magic to anything.
Ashley: haha. That's just a fairytale, willy. *wiping her tears*
William: But it all can be magically amazing with love right.
Ashley: hmm yeah. Baby, I love you. More than you love basketball.
William: I love you more than you love music. *while kissing her forehead*


William mengalirkan airmata disaat mencium dahi isterinya. Baginya, satu impian untuk mencium dahi seorang isteri yang baginya teramat istimewa. Alangkah bertuahnya dia rasa apabila berbuat demikian dengan isterinya yang sah. Tiada siapa dapat menduga William akan mengalirkan airmata tetapi itulah hakikatnya. William segera mengelap airmatanya tetapi dihalang sementara oleh Ashley.

Ashley: You know what, let people know how beautiful you are inside. I'm not surprised with your tears because I know you're so sensitive inside. People often judge us for several mistakes, but right now, this tears prove to everyone how wonderful you are.
William: Stop making me cry, Ashley.
Ashley: haha. see? I told ya. Come, let me wipe it for you.


Orang sekeliling memberi tepukan gemuruh pada mereka apabila mereka berhenti menari. Bak kata orang putih, standing ovation untuk mereka. Mereka berjalan menyusuri lorong yang dibuat khas untuk mereka ditaburi orkid putih dan bunga sakura yang dibawa khas dari Jepun. Lampu-lampu berkerdipan dan dinyalakan khas untuk mereka. Lorong itu membawa mereka ke satu taman di sekitar situ. Sedang orang menjamah selera di majlis itu, William membawa Ashley keluar dari situ dan membawanya ke taman yang tidak jauh dari situ. William mempersilakan Ashley untuk duduk diatas bangku yang disediakan dan berkata sesuatu kepada Ashley.

William: I have one thing to say to you. No, it could be a thousand questions in my head. Why you agree to marry me? Why me?
Ashley: I don't want to say anything.
William: Why? 
Ashley: Because love is undescribable. Because for me, there is no reason to love someone. Love is love. It just happen spontaneously. And I feel so comfortable around you. I feel safe. That's why. 


Dalam pemikiran William, memang itu jawapan yang ditunggu oleh dia. Dia sudah mencari jawapan yang begitu dalam seorang perempuan untuk jangka masa yang lama. Mungkin ada betul kata orang, jodoh tak ke mana. Perbualan disambung.

William: You know Ashley, I can see my future with you. Having kids, you always around me, support me, and I do need you in this life. To be honest I don't expect things would be this wonderful, having you in front of my eyes, I'm holding your hand, this is some special feeling. I never feel this way before. 
Ashley: *while in tears* me too.. *speechless*
William: hey, do you still remember when we bought shoes together? That converse shoes?
Ashley: yeahh, i still remember. Why?
William: Shoes and Heart. Two different things but have a deep meaning for me. 
Ashley: What is it?
William: When you put your shoes together with my shoes, I feel your heart and my heart together as one. Two pieces of shoes bla bla bla....
Ashley: hey willy, stop it. You make my heart tickling. You're romantic but it's clearly you can't arrange your word properly isn't it? 
William: *sigh yeah you right.
Ashley: hahaha. I get the point, my husband. Two shoes are together as one, just like our heart.
William: haaa, that's what I'm tryna say!
Ashley: haha. Learn better, kiddos !
William: *about to tickle Ashley*


Tiba-tiba kawan William dan Ashley datang. Mereka semua dah berpakat untuk mengenakan pasangan itu memandangkan ini malam pertama mereka akan bersama.

Bart: Hey buddy ! What's up? Ahhh, sweet moment with your loved one? Get over it. haha. C'mon, we have unsettle business here.
William: C'mon man, understand my situation here. Me and Ashley are about to spend our night together as married couple. You know what I mean right.
Bart: C'mon! Besides there several of our friends who have came here so far from their home. They must be waiting for you. C'mon, let's enjoy the night with us !
William: I don't know man, I can't leave my wife here alone.


*Ashley receives one text from her bestfriends*


William: Now what?
Ashley: It's Felicia. She asked me to join her to celebrate my wedding day at the house. She have arranged some sort of party specially for closest friends and family. It's just for girls. Hmm if I go there, I have to spend the rest of the night with them. 
William: Hmm does that mean I have to spend the night with him?! *pointing to Bart*
Bart: hey watch out buddy ! You're lucky to have me as your best man. 
William: yeahh right. hahahaha.


William pun mengucapkan selamat tinggal buat sementara dekat Ashley dan mereka masing-masing menuju tempat yang dicadangkan. Memang ini suatu konspirasi kelompok kawan-kawan baik mereka. Mereka sengaja membawa Ashley dan William ke tempat yang berlainan dan mencipta satu alasan yang tidak mungkin mereka boleh tolak. Bart dan Felicia suka mengusik pasangan tersebut. Mereka memang bercadang sesama sendiri untuk mengacau malam pertama mereka. Sepanjang malam dihabiskan bergembira dengan kawan-kawan. William dan Ashley menghabiskan malam-malam mereka dengan sahabat dan melayan kerenah Bart dan Felicia yang sedia maklum suka mengusik mereka.

William: Man, you have to 'pay' my first night as married couple.
Bart: hahaha. Chill man. I love teasing you around ! Now look at you. You look like a lost man. Chill, we will enjoy the night like a gentleman !
William: hahaha. You're lucky you're my childhood friend. 


Dan malam itu berterusan sampai Ashley dan William kepenatan apabila menghampiri katil mereka. Sungguh penat mereka. Kesian mereka diusik oleh kawan-kawan mereka. And they sleep safe and sound. Just like that. Tetapi sebelum itu, William sempat mencium dahi Ashley sebelum dia meletakkan kepalanya diatas bantal. Walau penat mana sekalipun, William tekad untuk berbuat demikian sepanjang hidupnya. Dia menyelimutkan Ashley dan baring sambil melihat isteri disebelahnya. Dia memeluknya. Dan dia tidur dengan cara yang paling tenang baginya, dengan isteri dalam pelukannya sebagai peneman malam mereka yang pertama.

footprints in my heart (part 1)

Ashley datang ke gelanggang tempat William bermain bola keranjang. Dia suka tengok teman lelakinya itu berlatih. Kalau ada kesempatan masa, mereka lebih senang habiskan masa bersama. Mereka lebih suka membuat semua kerja harian bersama. Ashley yang merupakan guru muzik di akademi tempatan amat gemar menghabiskan masanya mengajar dan menulis lirik lagu. Tetapi William yang merupakan pemain 'small forward' dan 'shooting guard' kelab terkemuka USA dan pelajar jurusan akaun di UCLA, jarang ada masa untuk Ashley. Tetapi, Ashley faham. Dia sedar akan hakikat yang William itu kekurangan masa untuk mereka. Akan tetapi, pada masa yang sama William cuba sedaya upaya untuk mengadakan masa untuk sahabat dan cinta susah senangnya. Mereka amat mencintai satu sama lain. Like they're meant to be together. Nothing in the world would break them apart.

Ashley pun teringat bagaimana dia pernah menguji William dalam usaha untuk memenangi hatinya. Ashley nampak kesungguhan William apabila dia sanggup dan berani berjumpa dengan ayah Ashley yang sedia maklum amat garang dari luarannya tetapi William cepat mesra dengan ayahnya. Terdetik juga dalam benak Ashley pada suatu masa dahulu William menubuhkan satu yayasan anak yatim berdekatan dengan tempat tinggal mereka. William berasal dari keluarga yang sangat rumit. Sebagai contoh kakaknya merupakan anak angkat yang diambil dari rumah anak-anak yatim oleh ibu bapanya. Dari situlah timbul ideanya untuk menubuhkan satu yayasan untuk membantu kanak-kanak yang kurang bernasib baik. Alangkah tersentuhnya hati Ashley pada masa itu. Dia tahu William seorang yang sangat baik dan berbudi bahasa. Amat menyukai kanak-kanak. Dia tahu William boleh melupakan segala masalahnya apabila bersama dengan budak-budak. Sukar baginya untuk menyalahkan William dalam banyak perkara. Ashley pula lebih suka menyakat teman lelakinya itu. Ada-ada sahaja idea datang dalam kepalanya. Begitulah juga halnya apabila berkenaan dengan penulisan lirik lagu. Apa yang boleh dikatakan, they're perfect for each other.

Satu hari yang biasa, sesudah Ashley habis mengajar, kebiasaannya dia akan pergi ke gelanggang di mana William berlatih bersama ahli pasukannya. William yang sedang giat berlatih berhenti seketika untuk menyambut temannya itu.

William: hello dear. how's your day?
Ashley: just fine. the students couldn't stop playing around. but i think they're just having fun with themselves after been through a tiring week. you know they just won national championship last week.
William: i see, yeah they should take a break after all that. perhaps you can give them an off day?
Ashley: hmm i will think about it. how's you day?
William: i'm doing great with the teammates. we have an important match next week so we just have to keep focus straight to the game. i think we can win this. by the way, i have reserved a special seat for you. may you join us?
Ashley: haha. really? hmm let me think about this. im not sure...
William: please? i need you to be there.
Ashley: urm, i don't know. (she loves to tease William)
William: okay, up to you.
Ashley: I'm just kidding, willy. smile! i will be there okay?
William: yeahh i know you were kidding. haha. gotcha ! alright, make sure to be there in time.
Ashley: okay! 
William: I love you, sweetie.
Ashley: I love you even more, more than you can imagine. am i?
William: Ashley Rogers...
Ashley: haha yeah. i love you. more than you love basketball.
William: *tickling ashley*
Ashley: hey watch out! i might kick you later!
William: I don't care !


Begitulah mesranya dua orang pasangan sejoli tu. Kita dapat rasa keintiman mereka. Kita boleh definisikan mereka sebagai pasangan yang sempurna di mata kasar. Ramai juga yang cemburu dengan mereka. Ada-ada je orang luar yang berniat untuk memisahkan mereka. Tetapi mereka tahu, walau apa sekali pun, kepercayaan sesama sendiri amat penting dan kejujuran memainkan peranan amat penting dalam hubungan mereka. Tambahan pula, Ashley dan William telah banyak harungi segala cabaran bersama dan mereka tahu yang masing-masing menghormati sesama sendiri dan percaya setiap kejatuhan pasti ada kebangkitan selepasnya. Optimistic la katakan.

Semasa perlawanan, William bersungguh-sungguh untuk memenangi trofi kejuaraan kebangsaan bertaraf dunia itu sambil ditonton oleh Ashley di tepi gelanggang. William tahu dia perlu menang demi Ashley, keluarga, ahli pasukan dan paling pentingnya, untuk dirinya. Pada minit2 akhir, William telah menjaringkan skor kemenangan kepada pasukannya dan membuatkan pasukannya juara pada tahun itu. Dia juga telah terpilih menjadi MVP(Most Valuable Player) selaku penjaring terbanyak kejuaraan itu. Tiba-tiba, William jatuh sakit di atas gelanggang. Tiada siapa yang tahu mengapa William tersungkur secara tiba-tiba. Hati Ashley berdegup kencang dan terus mencapai William. Seraya itu William terus gapai tangan Ashley dan menyuruh Ashley melihat kepada scoreboard tertera 'Will you marry this dumb and silly guy, Ashley?' Ashley terus menangis dan menampar muka William. William terpinga-pinga. Mengapakah dia berbuat begitu?

Ashley: how could you! *while slapping william*
William: why my dear? is there something wrong?
Ashley: YES ! you surprised me with this, whole world is watching, you were laying on this court and i thought you were not breathing. it's like an end for me. you made my heart stop beating for a second. and something better happens. 
William: *smiling while in tears*
Ashley: yes i do. *hugging his boyfriend*
William: i love you, sweetie. more than you love music.
Ashley: i love you, silly boy. more than you love basketball.


Penonton yang hadir pada masa itu turut berdiri dan mengucapkan tahniah kepada pasangan tersebut. Semua penonton bersorak dan menepuk tangan untuk mereka. Para media turut berkongsi kisah gembira itu. Hanya pasangan itu sahaja yang tahu betapa gembiranya mereka pada masa itu, pada saat itu. The best moment of their lives.

time will bring your heart to me

seriously, lama gila tak mengupdate blog ni. nak blogwalking apatah lagi. so sorry if sesiapa suruh blogwalking tapi aku tak buat. i didn't have much time before. so i really am sorry. if i do have the time surely i will leave my footprint on your blog.

heartbroken. happy. sympathize. sad. pain. joy. frustrated. you name it all. semua tu banyak berlaku sepanjang tak active sangat dekat alam maya ni. semua benda tu pengalaman kan. so just let it be. i know God have better plan for me. i will work it out 'til i get it. the rest, it leaves to Allah itself. plus we can't escape from reality right.

how can i say this. im facing probably one of the huge changing in life. i must say i hate it. one day you get used to it and enjoy it. one day you did the same mistake over and over again. one day you bla bla bla. i didn't get it. changing is what we have to face everyday as long as we live on this world? i have seen a lot of changes. but this? only God knows what's in my mind right now. 

do we truly know the difference between friendship and love? sometimes i get confused with it too. we all confuse with ourselves especially at my age. at the age of 18, i faced a lot of changing. pardon me if i use a lot of  'changing' here but this is what's happening in my life. truth to be told, i have to deal with a lot of occasion when i have to fight with changing and it was tough and hard and painful. it all started last year. seems like everyone will go away from me. agaknya bila sampai masa aku? serious rindu dengan semua sahabat- sahabat dari kecil and my late sister. ya Allah, tempatkanlah mereka dikalangan orang beriman. Aminn.

haihh. entah lah aku sendiri tak tahu kenapa dengan diri aku right now. macam macam benda kena dekat aku. aku sendiri dah dapat rasa tanggungjawab yang harus aku pikul. it's okay, one day i will be the man of the house. oh ya, teringat pula yang last monday, my grandpa telah kembali ke rahmatullah. my classmate, badruzafiq, ayah dia pun dah kembali ke rahmatullah last tuesday. Al-fatihah to both of them. i know how it feels, dude. all i can say is you must stay strong and whenever you miss your dad, just pray for him. that's the best thing you can do for him. 

peeps, just so you know that recently i have finished my job as music tutor and i will concentrate on my life right now. as SPM candidates last year, this upcoming wednesday gonna be huge. actually, im not ready for the result yet. *sigh what to do. all i can do right now is pray. goodluck to all 2011 SPM candidates. wishing you guys all the best. 

i believe that things happen for a reason. things may be rough for me right now but after i get a hint from Allah, i know i have to believe in Him. believe in qada and qadar as long as i put my effort in it. i know that one special day will come. gahh i feel sleepy now. got to go now. if you guys manage to read all of this, big applause to you guys ! lol. i will blogwalk to your blog and just leave your link here in my cbox ya. take care everyone. stay positive. keep your head up. and dear to that one particular person in my mind right now, i miss you. 

love is looking together in the same direction

In a class,

Girl's Version,
first day: i saw an idiot sleeping on the front bench.
second day: saw the same idiot getting punished.
third day: he was fighting with a boy. huh. idiot.
fourth day: i couldn't find him.. where is he..

Boy's Version,
first day: when i opened my eyes, i saw her. her smile.. wow!
second day: i got punished so that i could see her all the while.
third day: a boy said something bad about her and i failed to control my anger.
fourth day: i was sitting on the last bench and she turned to find me. yes, she saw me and we smiled meaningfully. :)

love can be cruel sometimes. so be it. it's still the best feeling in the world.

the only thing matter is in front of you

have you ever wonder you want everything in your life instantly? termasuk juga dengan harta, duit, family, friends, anything. you may get it but it won't be perfect. If it does, you will want more and kita pun terpengaruh dgn cerita Tangled; ''If you have reached your dream, find another dream''. sama je concept dengan benda yang kita nak. kita takkan puas. sampai bila kita nak puas? *kenapa aku tiba2 rasa awkward dengan ayat aku tadi eh? never mind.

in my opinion, we will NEVER satisfy with the things in front of us. once we get it, we will simply forget the basic thing in life, appreciation. bila dah dapat sesuatu barang tu, bersyukur la cuz tak semua orang akan dapat benda yg dorang nak. let's imagine this, try to put your position in lesser fortunate people. perhaps that way you can start to appreciate things in your hand. just saying.

in family or friends matter, sometimes they won't get to see our existence as we're just bunch of people who they might think we don't have any feeling. but truth is, everyone has a feeling. at some point you will cry about this, realizing that no one care about your feeling as if you're alone in this world. do you want to keep it in this way? do you? do you? do you just want to let go of it and let time solve it for you. time might be your slave if you use it right but its not the best counselor. you have to try how to solve it and whatever it is, if you failed, it is not the end of world for you. at least you tried. who knows in the future things happen much better for you. things happen for a reason right? kita mungkin takkan nampak benda ni, kita pun bukannya pakar tilik. but as a muslims and human, we just have to believe in this phrase. it did actually happen. don't hope for it. believe it.

i'm a typical teenagers. sometimes i don't realize how much do i neglect something important in my life. when i do, i have been at the lowest point of life. sometimes i just want to die to make it easier. but running from your problems does not solve anything, even dead. embrace it. be brave enough. i learnt something valuable, you can't be a coward if you want to survive. at the same time, be confident with yourself. take note, if you want to help people by supporting them, you have to support yourself first. see, this is self-appreciation. *wujud ke perkataan macam tu?

anyway, get started by appreciate everything in your life. family, friends, clothes, shoes, fitted cap, etc. we don't want to end up in miserable when we lose that 'things' and later we know how much does it meant to us. i don't know about you, but everything i have in my life, in any aspect, i want to praise to Allah cuz giving me a chance to have my wish. He granted my wishes though some of it weren't perfect. start to learn to appreciate people and things around you. insyaAllah, you will get the same thing in return. karma does actually exist! *amal punya ajaran. but karma also comes from Allah. okay, that's it for now. time for me to sleep. :) ttyl.

nobody can be successful unless he loves his work

it's sad to see that nobody cares and leave them breathless. some of them stated that this is part of their life. some says they can't live without it. some says they can't go a day without it. what is it? music. everyone loves music right? who doesn't? there's a bunch of kids who's very keen to play music at such young age. maybe they were inspired by musician like yiruma, sung ha jung, bach, rachmaninoff and many more. i have this one lucky chance and might be opportunity once in a lifetime to teach several of them at home. yeah, as i didn't do anything at home, my piano teacher had offered me a job to teach kids music at their home. we can say that i'm a private tutor, in music.

 i get to see this lovely and wonderful kids as my student, how they passionately want to play piano, guitar. i'm so glad to teach them whenever they need me. even their parent have been looking forward to see their kids play some instrument. you know, one of my student named lucy has been my favorite student. haha. you know she's naughty, so stubborn but yet she has that pure talent i rarely seen anywhere. i can tell you she might play better than i am when she's at my age. she's amazing. they way she play it, i know it was from her heart. despite her young age, she improved a lot better than any of my students. i don't expected that. sometimes she reminds me of the young me. sometimes we quarrel a lot, but when she plays, i looked at her and i tell this to myself, how lucky iam to have this little girl as my student. she even called me 'sir wolf' haha. for your info, she's the first student to call me 'sir'. sometimes she called me 'wolf'' instead of 'sir' whenever she feel unsatisfied with me. haha. you know, now i miss her so much. haish, that kiddo. :') this little girl has been special to me. well, we can say that i already treat her like my own daughter. lol.

but i know, she won't live longer. her mom has told me that she has a cancer and the chance for her to live is too low. i really feel sorry for her. at such young age, she has to struggle so many things in her life, knowing that her pain could kill her. i just hope for this miracle so that one day she would survive. yeah, that's one of my dream now. i really want her to be safe. she inspired me a lot in such short time. i will definitely encourage her to fight against her disease until the end. i will try my best to help her.

eventually, i really love all my student. because of her, i get to learn to appreciate everyone in my life, including all my students. beside that, i really do love my job. i get to see these kids every single day. i love kids! i love music! so this is a perfect job for me. to lucy, i just hope you're gonna be alright, eh? there you go your favorite word, 'eh'. well, keep on positive. i will see you in the upcoming class! :') also to my other students, i can't wait to meet you guys back. i already miss you guys a lot. period. :( 

So it's a Lunar New Year right? I hope this isn't too late but Happy Chinese New Year to all my chinese friends including my classmates and my lovely piano teacher. to all chinese around the world, Gong Xi Fa Cai!

10 Things In Ten Days

Holla Monster(s).

today i found this interesting challenge about describing yourself and it looks fun. so i have been thinking, why not if we give it a try? so that you guys will know who iam in a real world. :) and you are welcome to join this fun challenge too. so yeah i will start anytime from now. just wait and read. :) enjoy.

• day one : 10 things about you
• day two : 10 things you love
• day three : 10 things you hate
• day four : 10 things you want to say to one person
• day five : 10 wishes
• day six : 10 items you can’t live without
• day seven : 10 important people
• day eight : 10 of your favourite songs
• day nine : 10 ways to win your heart
• day ten : 10 final words

a smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks

Girl: may i confess something?
Boy: sure, I'd love to know that !
Girl: you have the most beautiful smile I have ever seen !
Boy: hehe, thank you. but may i confess something too? 
Girl: sure. =)
Boy: this beautiful smile is just for you 'cause you made it ❤

aren't they the cutest couple ? :)

heart touching story must read

Girl : im having a heart surgery today.
Boy : i know.
Girl : i love you!
Boy: i love you more, much more!

after surgery, when the girl woke up, only her father is next to her bed.

Girl : where is he?
Father : you dont know who gave you the heart?
Girl : what? (she starts crying)
Father : lol. im just kidding. he went to the toilet. :P

you still as beautiful as the first day we met

If you have her, do all you can to keep her. Dance with her, tell her she is as beautiful as the day you first beset eyes upon her flawless visage. Hold her as if fate's arms will cascade at any moment and steal her from you. Lay with her, in your times of mitigation. Believe in your heart that she was made, created by divinity just for you. When she is brought to tears, be there to dry them with reassurance. Love her, until love itself, has withered away. which is hopefully at the end of days.

i burst out into tears when thought of this

He was right there on the other side of the bridge. All she had to do was go. With hesitant, light footsteps, she walked across it and stopped, only to find herself ten feet away from him. Her mouth opened to call for him, and no sound came out at first. Quickly, her tongue swiped over her lips and she swallowed. His name escaped her lips softly, and he turned. The eyes of both grew wide, and they ran to each other, locking in a tender embrace of smiles and tears.

Why Are Men Such Jerks?

holla2 monster(s).
for men, dont think negatively. im a man too. you know what? for us, we've been given these question many times by the woman and we couldn't answer it right? we'd be speechless and standing there like nothing's happen but actually on our mind we wanted to try and give the best possibly answer to the question. i think the question above have been answered by Justin Timberlake himself on 'Why Are Men Such Jerks?' in the video below. lol. for guys who having this kind of situation can refer to this video and answer perfectly that would make our woman's world better without this question playing on their mind and found a deadlock. it's a win-win situation, dont you think so? :) enjoy.

for those who didn't hear clearly of what he said, i will write it down. oh before im late, did you know why Ellen(the host) asked justin about the question? for those who know taylor swift and read her lyrics deeply, she always mentioned that guy is a jerk and she always write a song about one guy that broke her heart. mostly who had been in a relationship with her. ouch, thats hurt. =.=' and before she became famous, she has had a longtime celebrity crush with justin timberlake. i bet you guys have been in that situation too, aren't you? :) ellen used this opportunity to ask justin and see what he'd answer. haha. 

Ellen: why are men such jerks, justin go ahead and tell her. 

Justin: well, ahh, why im into it. god where'd do i start? uhmm well ahh, you know women are, women, women, you guys, you LADIES are uhmm, you just smarter than us. and uhh see, see i've accepted that, i've accepted that. im much more comfortable in my stupidity. i just rolled with it you know. so that makes me less than a jerk.

p/s: i love taylor swift. :D btw, justin timberlake FTW! 

You've Got Magic Inside You And You Will Prevail

assalamualaikum reader(s)
actually today nak cerita psl salah satu movie trilogy yg paling best in my opinion. Avada Kedavra! err tahu apa kan? bagi sesiapa peminat harry potter or yg pernah tengok movie or baca novel dia, you will recognize those word from the Dark Lord. :) yeah, recently harry potter and the deathly hallows part 2 came out and spread the magic to audience last month. you know what? believe it or not this week i have been watching it for million times. you wont know how much this story influenced me so much and i grew up with this movie. ada part sedih, gembira, frustrated, suspen, semua ada. kira mmg complete in one adventurous storyline. :')

i grew up reading the books.

i grew to know that love between friends is just as important as love with our family.

i grew to understand the right things to do are not always the easiest.

i learnt about the power of will.

mmg sedih harry potter ni dah habis, but also we know that harry kicks voldemort's ass. lol. and one of the best part is, actually the cutest part when harry with ginny and ronald with hermione send their kids to the train for school at hogwarts. i still can remember that one of the harry's son named albus severus potter. how cute is that. :> yeah, u can call me anything, iam a big fan of harry potter since the day its first movie until now. i know kind of childish but who care. :) i will miss this movie. :')

p/s: yeah, we are a proud GRYFFINDOR! right gabe? :)

You Can't Look At A Sleeping Cat And Feel Tense

holla2, peep(s).

today july 1st 2011. a half of 2011 has gone. so many things happened in the past. the memories will never be erased. we shall never look back and gotta move forward aight? past is past. :) i didn't go to school today. yeah i still have bad fever. damn it, i wish this could be end soon. :( oh well, that's not my point. what im gonna tell write is, i found this cute and yet adorable video on youtube. it's about cat's diary. believe it or not, this short film was captured by the cat itself (!) wanna see how it was happened? have a look at video below. :) sit back and enjoy it.

p/s: yeah, im a big fan of cats. :)

I Wish I Could Throw You Away

holla follower(s).

since yesterday, i have some really bad fever. oh my goodness i really hate it. can you imagine when you can't sleep well, when your body temperature getting higher but you had cold and flu, when you can't walk too much just because you want to keep your body temperature normal with blanket, sweater, etc. *sigh. how i wish this could be over right now. sekarang ni musim demam ke? ramai juga demam minggu ni. including my own classmates. yeah today i didn't go to school. pagi tadi my mom sent me to the clinic. already got my mc. so yeah i really 'enjoy' my time on the bed doing nothing. #sarcatism. this is a strange feeling. haihh. oh well, i think that's it. btw, i changed my blog's theme song to eminem's. he's fucking amazing and one of my favorite rapper of all time. peace out (!). if you're wondering, ini lagu Space Bound - Eminem. :) 6 days ago he released a music video of this song on youtube. better check him out.

p/s: reader(s), doakan i cepat sembuh. so that i get back and do my things normally like before. you know i having trouble in study. i can't learn properly, i couldn't eat because of that sore throat, i can't do my regular things. i hope this gonna over soon. take care everyone. im off to bed. :(

You're Strings of My Heart

assalamualaikum, everyone. :) 

for me, today is simple. but yet full of happiness today. im pretty enjoying my life today, having a great time with my friends, the best moment with my sweetheart, and enjoying my time with my family. what a wonderful life today. yeah, after several things happened in a past few weeks, i think we should take a break from 'stress' sometime. just do something that can make you happy, even more. what else we could ask from God beside happiness in life? yang dah pergi meninggalkan kita, it's time for them to leave us. tuhan lebih sayangkan mereka dari kita rite and mereka dlm perjalanan utk menemui Ilahi. so yeah, mmg kita sedih, but bila fikir balik, at the same time we should be happy for them because they can meet the Almighty. hope dorang di tempatkan di kalangan orang2 yang beriman. aminn. :)

hows exam? oh yeah, mesti tak nak beritahu result kan sebab yeah i know most of us dapat result yang mmg 'good2' sangat. but its okay, we gotta learn from our mistake rite? still ada masa. for those spm candidates this year, keep on study smart and hard. we have a real huge challenging exam ahead. this is gonna determine our path after spm and in life. you know what? i LOVE learning... I just hate test. can you imagine how wonderful it would be to learn new and exciting things without the concern of being 'graded'? (beautiful in theory, impossible in practice, i know) just a thought. :)

p/s: if ada chat you guys yg i lambat reply, im deeply sorry. sometimes i busy with my life. :) but keep on following, i hope you guys will keep reading my current or previous post. please take your time to read all my posts. hope you will enjoy. :) may have a really great life!

I'M NOT PERFECT, BUT I SURE AM HAPPY. 

You Left, and My Heart is a Ceaseless Sermon Of Loneliness

hey guys. sorry if ada chat you all yg i lambat reply. actually in the past few days were so rough for me and my sweetheart to handle. yeah, my lovely sister has gone, FOREVER. after she had a miscarriage, she was in critical condition. the moment when i received this news, i was like shocked to death. i hope it wouldn't happen but.... hmm. then at 4am in malaysia on june 3rd 2011, my sister has go 'back' to the Almighty. i hope this is all just a dream. baru nak dapat merasa jadi uncle. she's one of the closest person to me and took care of me since i was a baby. and the moment when she's gone, i was like nobody left in this world after my closest bestie, also i treated him like my own brother; afif had gone too, forever.. this was way too hard for me...

my sister was buried in California because she lived there with her husband before. after selamat kena kebumi, yesterday my brother in law came to malaysia to visit my parent and might take my parent to my sister's graveyard. i don't know yet, but it was planned that way.

what make it worse, yesterday too, our kitten, i mean my kitten with my sweetheart has died due to fighting with other cat.. tak cukup dengan itu, my gf's younger sister enters hospital today and will be operated caused by appendix tonite. so hope u guys can pray for her safety and hope she would survive the operation. aminn.

yeah, buat beberapa harini, mmg terok sgt for both of us. i hope that we manage to get through all this.. no matter what, we will survive this thing together.

p/s: korang, hope boleh doakan kesejahteraan kita orang berdua and doakan agar kita orang dapat melalui dugaan ni dengan tabah.

Lots Of Love to All my Followers.